Wow, how's that title. Two things that can be the most awkward topics to speak about. But it is probably the number one thing that most couples fight or stress over. So I'm here to speak about Relationships and Money and how to create a healthy open platform for this.
So number one thing here is, every relationship is different. No one can tell you how to be in your relationship because no one but you and your partner are apart of it. If there is something that works for you two but seems weird for other people (as long as you are both happy about it) then by all means continue to do so. This is just what works for Shane and I and it may not work for you. My number one rule is, be open. Don't hide your money away from your partner because that can create problems. And this is more so when you are living together and pay bills, rent, mortgage whatever. Be honest with what you have, how much you can give each other and what you spend. I think it's really important to spilt things 50/50. So make sure, if you are both working that you are dividing your bills and expenses equally. HOWEVER, Shane earns a lot more than I do and sometimes (ok, lately a lot) he will pay the bill up front and I will (slowly) pay him back. We are happy with this situation and it works for us. The worst thing you can do, if you are the one who pays for most of the bills extra is to hold that over the other person. That's not how relationships work. You can't use that against them or to make them feel bad. Either you stop being the one who pays or you understand that it's now our money not your money. Also, don't track each others spending. Ok, if you are struggling with money and this brand new TV appears in your house and then a new Bed and then a new car - yeah may be time to rein it in and look at where your money is going. BUT if you are both earning money and working, you deserve to treat yourself and spend your money how you like as long as the bills are being looked after too. It is very freeing, especially as a woman, to be able to pay for your own shit. Or to be able to pay the bill at dinner when you go out. It's nice to have your own money and to feel free with it. It's just important to remember, if this person is the one you are going to spend your life with, that it's also important to be open and responsible with it. If you are bad with money, tell your partner. Ask them for help and guidance. Maybe like them open a savings account for you. They should want to help you and get you on track if they are good with money and you aren't. It's what relationships are all about, some people have certain strengths where others don't, it's normal. Use each other to make you, as a couple, stronger. Don't forget that you are a team and as that team you should want the best possible outcome for both of you. As a team, you also need to put in the same amount of effort to make the team work. Don't get lazy in your relationship. And also, don't let money become your goal. Yes, it's nice. Yes it makes things easy when you don't have to stress about if you are going to have enough. But, money comes and goes, it's not something you can take with you and it's certainly not something that you should value over your partner. It's an age old saying but 'Don't let money become your God'. Yes, you shouldn't be stupid with your money but at the end of the day it's just money. You can always get more, you can always spend more. Use it wisely but don't let it control you. If you are interested in perhaps getting a little more money savvy I highly recommend reading The Barefoot Investor. It's an easy read and has some really interesting and useful tips. Basically, you need to find what works for you as a couple but nothing can be better than honesty.
0 Comments
If there is one thing that I absolutely love, it's comfort food! Give me all the potatoes, pasta's and breads in the world and I'd be one happy little girl. And I think a major reason that a lot of people fear going plant based is because they don't want to give up all the tasty, naughty foods that we love so much.
Well, newsflash!!!! You don't have too! There are literally HUNDREDS of alternatives out there now which makes switching to plant based soooooooooo easy. So, I'm going to show you below how I make a creamy, comforting potato bake that will knock your socks off. This is also budget friendly which I am all about because #poorbitch Ingredients 6 potatoes, peeled and sliced 1/4 Onion, diced 2 tsp of minced garlic 1 tbsp fresh thyme 3 tbsp Nutlex (or other vegan butter) 3 tbsp plain flour 4 cups Soy milk 1 tsp ground turmeric Salt and Pepper Method: Layer the potatoes, onion and garlic in a baking dish then cover with the thyme. In a saucepan, on medium heat, melt the Nutlex and whisk in the flour to create a thick paste. Add in soy milk, continue whisking, and add turmeric. Whisk on heat for about 5 minutes, you can add more milk if you choose - depends how thick you want the sauce. Pour the sauce over the potatoes, sprinkle with deserved vegan cheese and bake uncovered for 40 minutes or until I haven't eaten meat since 2013. I will admit I was always on and off ever since I could remember but growing up in a South African household meat was a staple part of our diet. The turning point for me was when I saw this video by PETA about the fur industry in China. There was this dog that looked EXACTLY like Chester (my child, my heart, my everything) and although it wasn't about eating meat it just totally changed something for me. And yeah, I used to eat meat and YES I used to actually enjoy it but I have never once missed it which I think has been the best thing for me.
In saying that, if you are thinking of going Veg or Vegan but you've tried before and you miss meat too much or you really struggled to figure out what to eat - don't give up! If you are serious about ditching meat, it is SO MUCH EASIER these days. There as so many meat alternatives now stocked at Coles and Woolworths that actually taste so good (not like ass like fake meat used to taste like) so it's really easy to substitute and make your favourite meat based meals. But, in saying that I think it's really important to take this as an opportunity to start realising how important it is to eat whole foods. I'll be the first to admit, I am a sucker for a face mask. I have bought every type from the supermarket (when they are on special of course) and am yet to find a store bought on that I actually see results from.
I always have the best intentions to try all the DIY masks out there but for most of them, by the time you actually buy all the organic ingredients you'll probably have no money left for rent, food, fuel etc etc. Now, I don't want to sound cheap but - I am. So, fancy-pants expeno (expensive) little things like that just aren't for me. BUT I recently started following @farahdhukai on instagram (I know, I may be slightly behind the times) but she has some INCREDIBLE skincare routines that are all natural, easy to make and most importantly CHEAP! My favourite mask she has would have to be the Flaxseed Mask, it reduces pores and tightens your skin - like a natural botox! And by reduces pores I mean really reduces pores. I'll be honest, I get fairly bad blackheads on my nose and have tried every type of nose strip (works for like a second) there is and just can't get rid of them! But after just one Flaxseed mask I noticed a HUGE difference and am so excited to keep trying it and see how much more they disappear! I will 100% be trying out her other DIY products (there is a funky eye jelly to reduce puffiness and black bags with the help of black tea - hello need that!) and will probably do another post about them once I have! If you aren't already following her (she's got 6million so you most likely already do) go and follow her! @farahdhukai x |
Author - Jayde Heathcote
How to be a Modern Goddess in this Modern World | Recipes and Lifestyle for the modern woman Archives
January 2019
|